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Learner Experiences

"I've been involved in transformational personal growth work since 1991 and this Inner Empathy work kicked my butt! Not only was I able to reveal some long-term patterns and behaviors that had previously eluded discovery, I distinguished a pattern in my relationships that had been running my life for many years". —Kim Wright J.D.

Topics And Skills You'll Be Learning In The 9 month Inner Empathy Muti-Modal Intensive

By the end of the nine month intensive, I feel confident you'll have the skills in holding compassionate presence for difficult aspects of yourself and naturally find yourself being less identified with them. I'd like you to know there's a certain spaciousness that people actualize. It comes as a by-product of doing the work and not a result of some contrived goal. You'll also be able to support and contribute to others in a very deep and dynamic way. Learning how to created the conditions for others in allowing their self-corrective mechanisms to flourish is a deep and lasting sort of contribution. This is truly supporting and helping from a different paradigm! Below are the topics we'll be covering in the 9 month course. If you have any questions, please set up a free get-acquainted session listed at the bottom of courses page.

Module One
• Explore The Challenges Of Cultivating Inner Empathetic Awareness
• Explore The Power Of How NVC Can Be Used As A Highly Effective Self-Referencing Tool For Deep Inner Work
• Connect With Ways Your Get Stuck Using The NVC Basic Forms
• Explore Your Unique Difficulties In Holding NVC Consciousness
• Identify When You Use NVC To Focus On External Triggers And How They Can Be A Subtle Way Of Blaming!
• Discern The Limitations Of Self-Empathy And How Inner Empathy Methods Can Facilitate Depth
• Identify The Difference Between Inner Empathy And Self-Empathy And When To Use Each
• Balanced Your Approach To Doing Inquiry Work
• Getting To Know Our Inner Cast Of Characters
• Deepening And Expanding The Inner Map By Using Parts Psychology
• Becoming Aware Of The Particular Way You Connect With Your Parts
• Process Language Options In Naming Parts
• Gaining An Experiential Understanding Of Empathetic Awareness
• Contrasting “Empathetic Awareness” And “Responding From Our Parts”
• Setting Intentions For The 9 month Course
• Cultivating Empathetic Awareness For Our Parts
• Discovering What In Ourselves Is Aware Of Our Parts?
• Steps In Cultivating Empathetic Awareness
• The Difference In The Depth Of Inquiry Between Self-Empathy and Inner Empathy
• Speaking For or To Our Parts Instead Of From Our Parts
• Allowing, Acknowledging, And Welcoming Your Parts To The Present-Time Experiential Table
• Encountering Difficulties In Welcoming Parts?
• The Form For Practicing Inner Empathy
• Deepening Our Engagement With Parts
• Speaking To A Part And Having An Empathetic Dialogue
• Parts Operating Under The Right/Wrong Paradigm
• Parts Carry The Internalized Voices From Our Past
• What Is Motivating You To Do Better In All Areas Of Your Life?
• All-Consuming Feeling States Parts
• Fulfilling Needs Of Others In Relation To Fulfilling Our Own Needs
• Attachment To Becoming What Is Idealized
• The Futile Ride On The Hamster Wheel
• Keeping Down The Pain
• How Do You Receive From Others?
• The Critical Parts Fundamentally Distrust You
• Parts Will Try To Mutate Into a Pseudo Empathetic or Pseudo-Compassionate Awareness
• Becoming Aware Of The Judgments Our Parts Hold
• How To Enter An Inner Empathy Inquiry
• Creating Emotionally Vivid Connections With Parts
• Seeking Permission And Connecting With Multiple Parts
• Asking Parts To Step Aside Or Connecting Empathetically
• Trying To Banish Parts Only Makes Them Stronger
• Stepping Back And Connecting With The Parts Reacting To Parts
• The Use of Invitational Language In The Support/Listener Role
• Becoming Aware Of The Activity In Our Inner World
• Overview Of The Inner Empathy Dynamic Process

Module Two
• Basic Inner Empathy Session
• Skills For Speakers and Listeners
• Distinctions Between Inner Empathy Session And
• Forms Of Guided Imagery And Visualization Exercises
• Steps For Doing Solo Inner Empathy Session
• Obstacles In Doing An Effective Solo Inner Empathy Session
• Steps For Being The Supportive Listener In An Inner Empathy Session
• Possible Listener Obstacles To Staying
• Present During Inner Empathy Session
• Using The Inner Empathy Session Sheets
• The Basics Of Connecting With Exile Parts
• Reasons For Creating Exile Parts
• How Our Protective Responses Imply The Pain Of Our Exile Parts
• We Can Know Our Exile Parts By The Intensity Of Our Triggers
• Strategically Connecting With Protective Parts To Access Exile Parts
• Connecting With Personal Growth or Seeker Manager Parts
• To Disclose Exile Parts They Protect
• Connecting To The Burden And Beliefs Of Exile Parts
• Connecting To Timid Exile Parts Incrementally
• Exile Parts Holding Intense Feelings
• Ways To Disclose The Exile Parts And The Judgments They Hold
• Difference Between Conscious Knowing and Unconscious Knowing
• The Judgments Our Parts Hold
• Translating The Judgments Our Parts Hold
• How Our Judgments Progress To Be Judgments About The Totality Of Our Being
• Understanding Subverbal Judgments
• Entry Points To Discern When Judgments Are Occurring Or
• Have Occurred In Your Experience
• Using These Entry Points To Stretch Your Ways To Connect To Parts
• Example Of How To Use The Disclosing Unconscious Judgments Worksheet
• When Unconscious Knowings Cannot Be Known

Module Three
• Counterattacking and Rebelling Responses To Self-Judgments
• Introduction To The Four Types Of Inner Responses To Self-Judgments
• The Subtle Way Our Responses To Self-Judgments
• Create Endless Loops and Keep Us On The Playing Field Of Judgment
• What Are Counterattacking and Rebelling Responses?
• Your Own Example Of A Polarizing Loop Between Two Parts
• How To Detect Whether Countering/Rebellious Parts Are Activated
• Cues To Identify Countering and Rebellious Parts
• Example Of Using Experiential Cues To Discover What Parts Are Polarized
• Empathetically Connecting With The Countering/Rebellious Loop
• Countering Responses In The Form of Angry Self-Aggression
• Connecting More Deeply With Countering/Rebellious Energy
• Rebelling Responses That Show Up As Inner Refusals
• Creating A Life Of Rebelling Against Being Controlled
• Accessing Exile Parts Beneath The Countering/Rebellious Responses
• Connecting To The Strategies Of Compensation And Recovery Of Lost Needs
• Holding Compassion For Your Countering/Rebellious Parts
• Intellectual Responses To Self-Judgments
• What Are Intellectual Responses?
• Examples of Intellectual Responses
• Cues To Identify Intellectual Responses/Parts
• Our Diagnostic Or Analyzing Parts
• Core Inquiry Questions
• Difference Between Theoretical And Experiential Connection With “Why”
• Working On The Self-Judgment Level
• Working Within Your Own System Of Meaning and Specific Language
• Connecting With Core Self-Judgments/Beliefs
• Cultivate Spontaneous Serial Emotional Accessing
• Defensive Responses That Become Life Themes And Patterns
• Helping and Contributing To Others Can Be A Defensive Response Therapist, Healer, and Coach Parts
• Absorbing, Agreeing, And Collapsing
• Responses To Self-Judgments
• Developmental Understanding Of Agreeing/Absorbing Responses
• Examples of Absorbing and Agreeing With Self-Judgments
• Teetering On The Axis Of Good/Bad Self
• Cues To Identify Absorbing Agreeing Responses
• Using The Presupposition Of Coherency Of Needs
• A Radical Viewpoint Of Low Self Worth and Self Acceptance
• Why Are We So Willing To Agree With Our Self-Judgments?
• The Core Inquiry Prompts For Agreeing And Absorbing Responses
• Creating Competing Needs Scenarios
• Ongoing Practice For Absorbing And Agreeing Responses
• Disconnecting, Numbing Out, Retreating And Disassociating

Module Four
• Connecting With The Future Projected Goals, Ideals, Standards, Assumptions, And Expectations In Which Our Self-Judgments Thrive
• The Comfort Of Absolutist Authoritarian Tones
• What Are Your Self-Judgments Comparing You To?
• The Positive Side Of The Dualistic Self-System
• Are You A Fish Swimming In The Modern Waters Of Achievement?
• Are You A Fish Swimming In The Spiritual Waters Of Achievement?
• Future Projections Attached To Exiled Material
• Taking Away The Future Exercise
• Transitioning From The Good/Bad Self System
• To Process Needs-Based Language
• Possible Pitfalls When Disidentifying With Ideals And Absolutistic Goals
• What Is Wrong With Having Goals?
• Making Self-Requests From A Context Of Abundance
• Reasons For Demand “Have to” Energy Our Requests
• Are there deeper needs at stake in getting this need met? (self-worth/acceptance/love)
• Core Needs Clashing In Relationships
• Am I Asking/Expecting Other People To Fulfill A Need That I Can’t/Don’t Fully or Partially Fulfill Myself?
• Breaking Out Of The Dynamic of Unfulfilled Internal Needs
• Creating A World From The Inner Abundance Of Fulfilling Your Own Needs
• Be The Need You Want Fulfilled In Life
• Building Your Outer World One Inner Need Request At A Time
• Applying The “Demand Test” When Making Inner Requests
• Clarifying An Important Distinction
• Doing Classic Shadow Work To Disclose Disowned Needs
• Two Approaches To Access Shadow Material
• Observing How We Respond Internally To External Criticism
• We Are What We See
• Deeper Ways To Explore How Our Triggers Are Related To Others
• Accessing Shadow Need Via Its Opposite Positive Judgments
• How Our Reactions To Others Point To Our Disowned Needs
• Exposing The Golden Shadow In Positively Charged Interactions
• Experiential Shadow Work Versus Intellectual Shadow Work
• Attitudes About Taking Responsibility
• Viewing Your Reaction As An Exception
• Using These Big Reactions As Teaching Moments
• Summary Of Connecting With “We Are What We See”
• Recapping The Journey
• Compassion And The Need For Self-Allowing
• Doing NVC Work In A Graduated Spiritual Path
• An Invitation To Continue The Journey Of Connection

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